Dear Mister Apple
I recently received my purchase from you in the mail. I am using it as we speak. My husband I must say is a bit jealous of my recent affection towards this purchase. I spend hours with it at a time. I smile while I use it and I pay it compliments. It is a very attractive purchase that you have sent me. It is large and shiny. It sings to me. It gets the mail for me. My husband does not like to get the mail for me. It also provides endless hours of entertainment.
There is one problem with the purchase that I would like to discuss with you. I am not sure how it happened, but it has. Little Dude, the resident 2 year old has a certain affinity for the mouse that accompanied this purchase. It is a fairly obscure item compared to the rest of the purchase. Perhaps Little Dude has discovered that it holds the power and that it controls the rest of the purchase and makes it do what I need to. I cannot seem to keep this item out of Little Dude’s reach. Is there a magnet in it? Does it secretly talk to Little Dude saying “Come play with me”? Does it turn bright colors when my little boy sees it that somehow makes it so attractive? If so, could you please send me an additional item that doesn’t have this defect? I would like a non-attractive mouse that Little Dude does not have an affinity towards. I have placed a picture of the offending item below for reference.
As I mentioned, I do enjoy the purchase. But I need an mouse that is not defectively attractive please.